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Only twice last season had the Lakers failed to score more than 80 points; only five times had they lost at home; and only seven times had they lost by double-digits.

Then there was Friday night.

Because when the Dallas Mavericks came into Los Angeles sporting their brand new powder blue alternate uniforms on the day before Halloween, it was almost as if they’d brought along a few bright blue smurfs to sit on the rim.

LA just couldn’t find the bottom of the net - nor keep it out of its own - in a somewhat lethargic effort, and the purple and gold fell by 14 to a swarming Blue Man Group.

“That’s one of the longest nights we’ve had here in this building,” said Phil Jackson. “Every time we got momentum, somehow or other we shot ourselves in our own foot.”

The first quarter served as a harbinger for the rest of the game, as the Lakers opened by hitting only 7-of-24 shots (29.2 percent) before Jordan Farmar broke through (the smurfs) for five straight points in under a minute to salvage the quarter trailing by only three.

That was nothing compared to the third quarter, when the Lakers committed more turnovers (seven) than they made field goals (six). That resulted in 15 points, while the Mavericks went the other way in scoring 26 to open up a 22-point lead that was mercifully cut to four with a Kobe Bryant layup and Josh Powell put-back in the final minute.

Now, if the Lakers were looking for excuses, a few obvious ones were readily available: Pau Gasol, so key to their offensive rhythm, missed his second straight game (hamstring), and the team hadn’t played a game in three days since the season opening victory over the Clippers, including a Wednesday off from practice.

That certainly didn’t impress Phil Jackson, who found a more tangible explanation for the loss.

“Our rhythm wasn’t good on offense,” said he of 10 titles. ” Defensively we didn’t read this team well at all. Their defense was solid, and we just tried to do things with one pass and hope to beat somebody one-on-one rather than playing team basketball on the offensive end.”

L.A. did finally come to life in the fourth, scoring the first eight points to cap a 12-0 run - which included a monster put-back slam by Shannon Brown - that almost became 15 when Ron Artest’s corner three rimmed out. Instead, Nowitzki converted a layup to get the lead back to 14 at 80-66, and Dallas never looked back.

Bryant’s struggles from the field were emblematic of the team’s, as he managed just 6-of-19 for the game. Derek Fisher fared no better, converting only 2-of-9 shots, while Ron Artest missed five of the six shots he took, committed five fouls and was whistled for a technical.

Perhaps the only good news for L.A. is they have to wait only a day before getting back in the mix for a Sunday game against Atlanta.

Until then, some numbers:

POSTGAME NUMBERS
2 Double-doubles in as many games for Andrew Bynum, his 14 and 10 coming in the first three quarters before he found a permanent seat on the bench.

5 Home losses for the Lakers in 2008-09, the best in the league.

7 Times the Lakers lost by double-digits last season.

12 Points off L.A.’s bench from Shannon Brown, who was very effective at both ends. He hit two threes, grabbed three boards, dished two assists and gathered two steals, all punctuated by a monster put-back slam when he climbed high into the air and finished with two hands.

18 More free throws taken by Dallas (32) than L.A. (14), as L.A. was whistled for 29 personal fouls to 21 from the Mavs.

39.5 L.A.’s shooting percentage for the game.

41 Bench points scored by Dallas, paced by 16 from Jason Terry and 12 from J.J. Barea. L.A., by comparison, scored 28 bench points.

While seven years would be the shortest of times between championships for most professional franchises, it seemed far too long for Lakers fans that have celebrated the riches of a franchise that won five times in the 1980’s, three straight from 2000-02 and 15 total. It’s all relative, after all.

Yet when longtime PA announcer Lawrence Tanter introduced each Lakers player, coach and team staff member to a packed STAPLES Center as rings were collected from NBA Commissioner David Stern, it was easy to forget that an actual game needed to be played between L.A.’s two basketball teams.

Indeed, the building’s co-inhabitants (the Clippers, of course) had to sit through the ceremony … And then go 48 minutes with a defending champion that had beaten them in eight straight meetings.

Make that nine.

Behind solid all-around games from Kobe Bryant (game-high 33 points), Andrew Bynum (26 points, 13 rebounds)and Lamar Odom (16 points, 13 rebounds and five assists), the Lakers emerged from STAPLES Center with a 99-92 victory (not to mention a shiny new toy).

Prior to the game, there was some question as to the Lakers’ level of focus after receiving championship rings that Phil Jackson – who knows a thing or two about rings – called “spectacular*,” particularly in the absence of Pau Gasol (hamstring). Early on, at least, the Lakers turned to Bryant to ensure that didn’t happen, and the Finals MVP went on the attack for 13 first quarter points to get the purple and gold out of the gates the right way.
*You can read all about the rings by clicking here.

Gasol’s absence would be felt early in the second quarter, however: with L.A.’s usual rotations out of whack, the home team’s bench allowed the Clippers to trim what had been a 13-point lead all the way down to three halfway through the second quarter.

But back came Bryant, who steadily helped the Lakers build their lead back to double digits at the half, thanks to 17 points, five boards and three steals. Much of his help came from Bynum, who looked just as good as he did while averaging 20 points plus in the preseason while matching Bryant’s 17 points.

Jackson talked about how effective Bynum had been on the offensive end (“It’s very hard to keep Andrew away from the basket”), but concluded his statement by re-iterating how important it was for Bynum to protect the basket. And while Bynum was effective on the glass with six boards at the half, he nor any of his teammates blocked a single Clippers shot, and the red and blue shirts were able to outscore the defending champs 25-17 in the third quarter to cut the lead to just one (76-75) heading into the final period.

Yet the seesaw tilted back in the Lakers favor, as they tightend up defensively and scored easily in the paint, led by a heavy dose of Lamar Odom. In fact, in the first six minutes of the quarter, Odom scored eight points, grabbed two boards (both offensive) and nailed his second three-pointer, helping L.A. boost its lead to 10 once again until Bryant, Ron Artest and Bynum came in to close the game.

“I thought that second unit in the fourth quarter with Lamar out there really got things going and in the fourth we were able to sustain it,” said Jackson, who also reserved praise for Ron Artest in his first game as a Laker.

“Ron did really well,” the head coach continued. “I thought he shut down defensively really well. Some offensive things he had opportunities on he didn’t complete, but I thought he looked like he was in the mix and knew what was going on most of the time and felt comfortable with what we were trying to do.”

Artest did miss his fair share of open shots (3-of-10), but he moved the ball well within the offense (four assists), hit the glass (five rebounds) and played the type of defense Jackson described.

Meanwhile, Bryant hit the 33-point mark with roughly two minutes to go in the game, while Bynum and Odom polished their mutual double-doubles that helped render L.A.’s first victory of the 2009-10 season, allowing the large collective pregame grins to stick heading out of the arena.

Up next for the Lakers is a Friday evening tilt against Dallas, but until then a few numbers upon which to chew:

POSTGAME NUMBERS
1 Fun story Phil Jackson told before the game: In his early days as an assistant coach for the Bulls, GM Jerry Krause forced him to wear the ring he won as a Knicks player because no one else had one (motivational tool). Jackson said he actually lost the diamond in the ring (there weren’t 14 diamonds then), and where did he lose it? Bennigan’s.

3 First half steals for a ball-hawking Kobe Bryant, who’d finish the game with four of L.A.’s 13 steals that helped push the Clippers to 20 turnovers.

9 Bench points for the Lakers, in limited time. The Clippers managed 29.

12 Second quarter points from Clippers reserve power forward Craig Smith, helping the Clips even up the Lakers at 27 for the period.

17 First half points for both Bryant and Andrew Bynum, who scored easily from inside and out.

22 Birthday for Bynum (video below), who celebrated the occasion by scoring 26 points, grabbing 13 rebounds and dishing two assists.

33 Game-high points for Bryant on 11-of-26 shooting and 11-of-12 free throws, plus eight rebounds.

38 Minimum minutes played by four Lakers (Artest, Odom, Bynum and Bryant). The Clippers, in contrast, had only one player (Chris Kaman) play more than 36 minutes (36:53).

Prior to Sunday’s Staples Center Shootout finale between L.A.’s two basketball teams, Phil Jackson was asked if he’d hold anything back, considering that the Lakers and Clippers open the regular season in just nine days.

“I hold back almost until March,” said Jackson.

Right. In other words, Jackson may toss in some sprinkles, hot fudge and (if he decides to get crazy) Gummy Bears come playoff time, but particularly in the preseason, it’s straight vanilla. No toppings.

Vanilla or not, 17,932 people saw a better-than-average preseason game that moved far more quickly than Saturday night’s win over Charlotte thanks to fewer fouls (55) and turnovers (29). As it turned out, the L.A. team wearing purple and gold overcame a poor first quarter to emerge with a 114-108 victory over the Clippers. The “home” team managed just 22 points to the Clips’ 33 in the first, but outscored their red and blue counterparts 92-75 for the rest of the game to get to 4-1 in the preseason.

Pau Gasol, Lamar Odom and Luke Walton missed the game with minor injuries for the second consecutive night - though Jackson said that all could have played were it a playoff game - leaving only Andrew Bynum to fill the void against a rather large Clippers squad.

That he did.

While L.A.’s 21-year-old center struggled to finish inside for the first time this preseason, hitting only 2-of-8 shots in the first half and 7-of-17 for the game, Bynum still managed to get the shots he wanted near the hoop despite the presence of seven-footer Chris Kaman, and impressed defensively and with his work rate in transition. Better yet, he had his best rebounding game of the preseason, cleaning the glass 13 times in 32 minutes to complement his 20 points.

“It was much better,” said Phil Jackson of his center’s performance on defense and the glass. “I thought the rebounding was good, and the fourth quarter run by (Bynum) and the second unit that played well enough to hold them off.”

Ron Artest had arguably his most comfortable performance of the preseason with 13 points, five rebounds and two steals in 24 minutes (”I thought he was very good,” said Jackson), while Adam Morrison, Shannon Brown and Jordan Farmar were all very effective off the bench. Morrison nailed all four of his three-pointers and had 14 total points, Brown went for 20 points on 8-of-13 shooting and Farmar added 11 points and a team-high seven assists in 24 minutes.

And so, whether Jackson is interested in the team’s preseason record or not, the Lakers coasted to their fourth win in five tries heading into Tuesday’s game in Ontario, CA, against Golden State.

POSTGAME NUMBERS
1 Lakers double-double in the game, assembled by Andrew Bynum. The young center scored 20 points and 13 rebounds in the first three quarters. No. 1 overall pick Blake Griffin (pictured at top) added a double-double with 13 points and 12 boards of his own.

5 Lakers players to hit at least one three-pointer (Adam Morrison, Ron Artest, Shannon Brown, Jordan Farmar and Tony Gaffney), led by four from a slick-shooting Morrison.

8 Clipper turnovers forced by the Lakers in the third quarter, as the home team took a 26-17 edge in the preseason to head into the fourth quarter up 83-77. The Lakers turned the ball over only 13 times in the game, forcing 17 from the Clippers.

26 Game-high points scored by newly-acquired Clippers reserve forward Craig Smith in just 22 minutes.

31.8 Lakers shooting percentage in a rough offensive first quarter, including 1-of-6 efforts from both Bynum and Derek Fisher. The Clippers capitalized by taking a 33-22 lead out of the initial quarter.

49.2 L.A.’s shooting percentage for the rest of the game, allowing them to outscore the Clippers 92-75 in the final three quarters to win the game by six.